Sunday, March 28, 2010

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

Yeah, that was a scream of excitement, don't you even fret.

So, remember how my last post was all whiney and 'woes me'. I'm over that.

Now I want to tell you why I'm excited about LIFE!!!

1- Um, I'm going to a Michael Buble concert in 3 days. Holy crap. Last tour was amazing, I've never seen such an entertaining performer. His voice is flawless live, he's hilarious, and did I mention he's stunningly attractive??

2-OK, so most of you know I'm a nerd. THIS weekend is.......(dun dun dun dun) Clash of the Titans. I truly believe that as of this moment, the trailer for this movie is the BEST ever made. I know the movie is going to suck, but MAN, they know how to make a killer trailer. I'm a sucker for kick-A trailer music and this my friends, is kick-A trailer music. Here's a link...you know...if you want to make your lives explode with awesomeness for approximately two minutes and nineteen seconds. http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2626946073/

3-Oh, what's on Monday?? Muse???? I think.....YeS! I've never been to an alternative concert before. I was just told today that I should invest in some ear plugs. I'm a little tempted to dress up completely goth. I could pull it off. Fo sho. I've got the moodiness going, ya know?

All this is happening THIS week! And I need to fit in job hunting, resume creating, homework doing.....etc. etc.

*Please keep your seat belts fastened and your arms and legs inside at all times, until the ride has come to a complete stop.*

'Nuff said. Peace!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

They Say You Can't Go Home Again. Unfortunately They're Right.

As I was on my way to the post office today, I heard Miranda Lambert's new song, "The House That Built Me." So all day I've been very...reflective...I guess you could say. Basically the song is about a girl who goes back to her childhood home to try and fix her life by looking to the past. Now, right now I know what ALL of you are thinking. You are thinking something like, "Um....Dug, how the heck does this pertain to you? You live with your parents.....still."
I know, I know. I'm a ridiculous person, but let me explain. So, I quit my job. As most of you know, I hate my job, so why would that make me sad? Well, I really like my co-workers. A lot. I've been through this before. I worked at Allens for six years. SIX years. That's a long time. It was like my second home. Rob was my second father.....who I felt uncomfortable talking to because I feared him. Kyle was the awesome uncle who made me laugh hysterically. Barry was that creepy stalker in your life that you don't know how to deal with...so you just go with it. Mani was like a cute little grandma who baked you cakes and wanted you to marry a rich husband. Peggy....I miss her. She owns goats. :) The checkers/baggers were like my siblings...and perspective spouses......though THAT never worked out. (Kiss mine, Pete!!!!) And Annette....oh Annette. She was my INSPIRATION!!!! I give her full credit for my decision on becoming a writer. If it weren't for her, I would never have dreamed to have the imagination to write creatively.
I know a lot of my friends and family thought it was not a good place for me to work. It took up too much of my social life (Like I even wanted one. Psh.) It stressed me out.....I smelled like fried chicken all the time...etc. etc. But I LOVED it there. When I was there, I felt confident, I felt safe, I felt like I was HOME. Then I quit, because you have to move on with life, I guess.
Let me tell you though, I miss that place every single day. When I drive by, I feel like there's a hole in my life. I can't even walk into the place because it makes me too sad. Not once since I quit that place have I felt half as confident in myself (Is that pathetic or what??.) Whenever my life gets all crazy, I honestly think to myself, "If I could only go back to my old Allens days. Then it'd all work itself out." That's why that song made me reminiscent. That, added to the fact that I have to go through it all over again.
I've become very good friends with everyone at Healthwise. They're like my family. They think I'm cool!!! It's a rare thing, finding people who've heard me clear my throat of a popcorn kernel and still respect me. :) Or not give me crap about being single......wait.....scratch that. They DO give me crap. Lots of it. But that's OK. I like them enough that I'm cool with it. All the hilarious videos, the hysterical conversations. I'll miss them so much. Sure, you can always try and keep in contact with people, but it's never the same.
Life never stops for you to catch up, and you have to leave people behind. In my case, it's usually me being left behind. I barely see my best friend who used to be attached to my hip (Thanks alot Brodie!). I never talk to my high school friends (except on Facebook. What would we do without it?) And it's not that I don't want to hang with them, or talk with them, and it's not that they don't want to see me, it's just a fact of life that people come and go. And it SUCKS. At the worst moments in life, you'd think that good memories would make things easier. But they don't. They just make the worst moments more terrible. Because you're stuck with the fact that you can't turn back time, you can't regain the friendships you once had, you can't relive the shining moments. Thankfully God is merciful and he keeps allowing new wonderful people to enter your life and sometimes there are those few who, for some reason, stick by you forever (Thank you, Nay!). And then there's family. Sometimes I don't treat them as well as I should because I start feeling crowded, and like I'm not my own person anymore, but at the end of the day they're all I've got. And I've really come to like them.
I apologize for the heavy post. I know I usually keep things light....and hilarious....but I guess there's two sides to every coin. I'll be on the up and up next post, don't you even fret. :D
-Peace!

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Once Upon a Time.......

I was at school.

Walking to the CS building, passing the Career Center.

At a desk sat a boy.

"Ooh." I thought. "That is one fine lookin specimen."

I walked on, feeling slightly happier. I mean, just knowing there are guys that good looking out there is a real comfort.

I go to math. Learn about stuff. Like Simple Interest.

"Haha, I've got Simple Interest. In that HOT GUY sitting at the Career Center." I chuckled inside.

Class was dismissed. I started for the library.

Once again, I was passing the Career Center.

I had stopped thinking about the boy.

THE boy.

But then I saw him again.

He was standing up, with a jacket on. Talking to girls. Gross.

Maybe his shift was ending?

I'm looking for a career. Maybe he can help me find out what my "options" are.....if you know what I mean.

Oh well, like I'd actually have the guts to talk to him anyway.

Wynona Judd's song I saw the light just started playing in my ears. I had my earphones in, jammin to my pod. That's a good song. Classic Country.

I looked at the TV on the wall as I continued walking. CNN was on.

The bottom had catching text that read: OKLAHOMA TORNADO. They were showing footage of destruction and misery.

I wanted to watch that. Because I'm morbid.

I stood for a moment, not really in the middle of the hallway, more to the side.

"I should get to the library." I thought.

I turned.

OH. CRAP.

I pulled out one of my headphones.

"Sorry, what?" I asked innocently.

"Oh I just was asking when that happened." the hot boy asked. THE hot boy. THE hot boy I'd been drooling over just moments ago.

"Oh, sorry, I couldn't hear you." I replied stupidly.

"Yeah, I know, I tried asking you when you had your back turned, but you didn't answer."

OH CRAP!!!! HOW LONG HAD HE BEEN STANDING THERE??????

"Haha. I wasn't trying to ignore you." I instantly regretted my statement, knowing is was LAME.

"Yeah, so when did that happen?" He asked, referring obviously to the footage on the screen.

"Oh, I don't know. Today?"

"Today? Are you sure."

"Not really. It hasn't said, I don't think."

"Oh, alright. See ya."

Then he walked away.

I had a difficult time keeping myself in an upright position for a moment.

Had that hot boy, THE hot boy, just spoken to me?

More importantly, did I really just say all those lame things in that really lame voice??

My whole being was just screaming- NERD!!!

But he had spoken to me. HE spoke to ME!!

And he saw the back of my head, which if I do say so myself, looked very nice today, because I did my hair in these cool braids.

But....I had my headphones in, and I totally didn't hear him the first time. Oh my GOSH, that is so embarrassing. I don't know why. But it IS.

I hope I looked good. I hope he was so stunned by my radiant beauty that he remembers my face and maybe next time I walk past the Career Center and he's sitting at that desk, he will smile at me. Maybe a funny wave. Even a pity wave, that's all I ask for.

I'm picturing it now. It'd be just like a scene in those movies where the main girl is really lame when you first meet her. I'm picturing a Sandra Bullock type character. I'd go up to him, thinking I was clever and funny and say (as I had my earphones in). "Haha, don't try and ask me anything." Then point at my ears. Then everyone in the audience would cringe at the awkward sight. He too, would be cringing. Inside, I would be cringing more than all of you put together because I KNOW it's so ridiculous what I just said. He'd give me a sympathetic smile, hoping I'd leave. I'd maybe throw in a few more forced chuckles to try and imply I really was cool, but so obviously was not. Then I'd turn and walk away. THEN the school would be attacked by evil ninjas and one would take me hostage. "Help me!" I'd scream in a 'damsel in distress' sort of way. Career Center boy would step out from behind the front desk, ready to save the day. "Excuse me Evil Ninja, but I think you should let the lady go." His voice husky and challenging.
Well, I think you know where this is going. Yes, you're correct. The shark gets away, leaving few survivors in his wake. But then he's defeated by a Panda. And the Humbolt squid take over the sea...and eventually....the world. The end.

Until next time. Peace!